I considered writing this review in ten second bullet points, in order to loosely represent the constant barrage of destructive setpieces that Mullet MadJack is built around, but the reality of doing so wasn’t as funny as I imagined, so take the thought for the deed, I guess.
Instead, I’m going to serve up a quick review for a quick-fire game. You see, HAMMER95’s Mullet MadJack is a fast and furious first-person shooter about speed, accuracy, and smashing up billionaire robo brains in order to inject dopamine into your system and keep you alive for mere seconds longer. Nothing more, nothing less.
I think it’s only fair to reference Post Void nice and early on. This is a similarly blunt first-person shooter that wants to you play at top speed or die. In turn, this succinctly violent pair of games owes an unpayable debt of gratitude to Doom and Unreal – and a plethora of similarly snappy shooters from the ’90s – which paved the way for the FPS genre as we know it today. In fact, it’s not just in the pacing as MMJ doffs its proverbial cap to the greats with its retro-futuristic cyberpunk style and head popping animations. MadJack knows who is and he wears his mullet with pride.
The point of a review like this is to tell you, Dear Reader, whether or not a game is worth your time and money. I can say, fairly unequivocally, that Mullet MadJack is absolutely worth taking for a spin. Here’s a few more paragraphs on why, for those who like to read beneath the fold:
I’ve mentioned that it’s fast, but it’s a theme that I’m going to double down on because Mullet MadJack is about both speed and haste. You move like lightning, dashing about rooms, onto platforms, down huge ramps, and through doors. Yet this breakneck speed is a means to an end; you’ve got to get to the finish line in each level before you run out of time and die. Yes, this is a game where tardiness means death. You have been warned, slackers.
Equipped with pistols, rifles and even swords, you take your mulleted hero on a stomp through a series of robo-goon-filled corridors. Everything is bold and brash, like some neo-futuristic cyberpunk nightmare where the worst parts of modern society have been transposed into a 2090 setting but viewed through a vintage manga lens. It sounds batshit but that’s because it is; in truth, it’s all the better for it.
Your mullet grows longer Your character grows stronger over time in true roguelite style, constantly earning improvements to sharpen those skills. During each run you get weapon and ability upgrades, too, so there’s a constant strengthening of MadJack’s character and skillset. Each completed level takes you closer to rescuing the princess at the top of the tower, while granting you a new boon to help you on your way.
Throughout this head-smashing, door crashing adventure the art and audio-visual presentation reinforce the game’s themes via its satirical commentary. It’s a bit clunky in places, sure, but I think that’s half the charm here. Mullet MadJack is unashamedly raucous and I enjoyed that side of things tremendously, even if some of the dialogue lines repeat a little too often.
On top of the “standard” experience and its many floors/chapters is an Endless Mode where one must keep throwing one’s mullet through a random assortment of levels until your time has come and the digits tick down to zero. When this happens your personal best is consigned to the leaderboards so you can see exactly how rubbish you are when compared to other people – or maybe that’s just me.
Mullet MadJack is a short and sweet shooter, so I’m not going to labour my assessment of it for the sake of the word count. Instead I’m going to heartily recommend it, based on the caveat that you like fast-paced action, vintage cyberpunk-infused manga, and mullets – this one has all three in spades.
As you’ve no doubt deduced based on the muddle of words above, Mullet MadJack is out now on Steam PC, where I played via access provided by the game’s publisher (and yes, before you ask, it worked well on my Steam Deck).
